Long Overdue

Well, I'm finally sitting down to write about men and women. I have been thinking about this topic for so long (topic being what differentiates a boy from a man, a girl from a woman). But a few months ago I really felt like I came across an answer. The thing that got me thinking about this was when I looked around, I knew people who were 27 who were women. I also knew people who were 27 who I considered girls. Why? The same goes for males.

Here are my two answers. The first thing that needs to happen in order for you to become a man or a woman (aside from you being at least in your 20's) would be the absence of any adolescent angst. And there is a lot of things to be angsty about. This is when you honestly start caring less and less about how people view you, about appearing a certain way, about making a certain statement with your looks. I noticed this change within myself (though I am far from being a woman) when I realized that I really don't want my labret piercing anymore. I used to like it because it was different, it looked good. It was my way of proclaiming my differences. I used to have blue hair for the same reason. Now? I don't need it anymore. I don't need to proclaim my differences at first glance, because I am extremely confident in the fact that you WILL notice that I am different when you talk with me. Also, my piercing made certain people not want to listen to me. They judged my words from the get-go, shading them a certain way because I had facial piercings. I would never want that. I know now that what I have to say is the most important aspect about me. I would never want someone to not give my words the respect and attention that they deserve because they see me as some punk street kid.


Secondly, I think that selflessness is what constitutes a real man. Take my dad, for example. I know without a doubt that there is nothing on the face of the planet that my dad would not do to help me out. Nothing. He drove eight hours to Panama City over night because my sister had the flu or something at cheerleading camp. He stops whatever he's doing to bring my spare keys to me when I lock my keys in my car. He didn't knock my intolerable ass out on the street when I was a lost little druggie in high school. He pays for me. He takes care of me. He does the same for anyone he cares about. No distance is too far to drive. No amount of physical labor is too much to bear. I started comparing his example to other real men that I know, and found this to be the case in each and every one. Selflessness is what really transforms us from boys into men, from girls into strong women. It is because we would give anything we can to be there for someone else. It seems cliche, but I know as a 19 year old girl, I am nowhere near this point. It is no small feat, and it can't be taught.


Anyway, the next topic is John Mayer's new album, Battle Studies. I haven't listened to it at all yet, but I looked up the lyrics this morning and read them all. I feel so sorry for him. The entire album is about Jennifer Aniston, and how she completely destroyed so many things for him. It seems like he fell in love with her right as he was convincing himself that he could never love at all...and he became in awe of her, and how she moved him, and how she had changed him from this selfish being into someone who was aware and in love and happy. But apparently there was one key element that neither of them could fix. I have no idea what it is, but it must've been terrible for both of them. You're so right for each other except for this one little wedge that ends up making it to where you just can't be together. That is the most painful kind of love, and so many other people have been there. All of his songs were so sad. He used really simple language, and a few rhymes, so that the lyrics themselves seemed kind of juvenile at first, but the heart behind them and the way he phrased certain things made you see that he was being honest, and that he was honestly lost. Read them yourself, you'll see. His album is called Battle Studies.

We all go through relationships that just can't seem to stay together, no matter how tightly we hold them close. It really is like a shakespearian tragedy playing out in the every day man's life. We all know. We've all been there. It's a universal sorry that doesn't ever get better, just easier to deal with. I think it's a beautiful thing. You've got the world's shoulder to cry on, John Mayer. :)


On a COMPLETELY SEPERATE NOTE, I can't wait to go home tomorrow. And I can't wait for Adam to fly to Houston on Friday, so that I can show him where I grew up, and who I was then. I couldn't stop telling him all of the places that I'm going to show him...my old high school, the mall, all the places that I used to explore with my dog, the place where I fooled some man into thinking that I was blind...


Good times.